I said I would share an article from the Harald Read Newspaper from my buddy Chuck who co-stars in my play,”Toe Roaster”.  For those of that have not seen him in the show.. well, Hamlet (his best friend in the show) puts it best, “He’s got all his tater’s, but half of ‘em’s mashed”.
So, here is Chuck’s latest article enjoy!
–   Bryan

I have to admit I had not one thought when I woke up this morning. Not a one, but I will tell you something that has been on my mind for the last few days. You ready? The Dentist! I know it ain’t normal at all to walk around for days thinking about the dentist, but it sure has been on my mind. See the Super Bowl is this Sunday, and I am going over to Hamlet’s ranch to watch the game on his big screen TV.  Big Daddy will be coming over with Little Momma and we all will pile in that room off the porch and ‘couch gate’… that’s what I like to call it.  It’s something we invented over at Hamlet’s. Anyway, I was over there the other day a few days back watching the playoff games, and like clock work when one of the three thousand commercials came on I would get up to get me a sandwich and some trail mix.  Well, off in the distance back in the TV room I can hear them commercials.  You might ask yourself, “What does this have to do with the dentist”?  Well, calm down that’s where I get confused too.
Did ya’ll know having a gold tooth ain’t popular no more? See, I was in Hamlet’s kitchen when I heard one of those commercials say something that kinda freaked me out! Here I had been saving up for many years to get me a gold tooth, but as it turns out they ain’t popular any more, or I guess they aren’t in style.
I was spreading some salve (mayonnaise) on a big ol’ bologna sandwich when I head the fella on the TV commercial say you could go down to one of those cell phone stores and get a ‘blue tooth’? A BLUE TOOTH! Well, I bout dropped the jar. I thought I heard him wrong, but he said it again and again. I think to quote him he said, “If you buy a phone you get a free blue tooth”. I set the jar down walked over to that little window in the oven and looked at my reflection. I smiled really big, and began to imagine me, ol’ Chuck, with a blue tooth? Well, I guess I could get use to the thought, but it might take a while, I was kinda liking the flash of the gold one that everyone could see while I’m riding my motor-sickle. I smiled bigger til Willa Dean came in and hit me on the back of my head cause she needed in the oven. (that’s where she puts Hamlet’s cell phone on the weekends so he can’t find it, and can’t get called away)
So there, now you can see why I am walking around thinking about the dentist. All of this is new to me, but I ain’t dumb.  It makes a feller wonder if a dentist don’t own all of them cell phone stores? I mean if you get a blue tooth who is gonna be the one that puts it in? Some sort of raquet I am sure of it. But, never the less it seems to be very popular. So, I guess I’ll give in and get me one of them cell phones so I can call my dentist to make an appointment to get my new blue tooth put in. I hope the women like ‘em. If they do, I might get two!
World Peace
—  Chuck     (Toe Roaster)

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